Reclaiming Your Voice in the Age of Coercive Control and AI Weaponisation
- Mia Dalessandro
- Jul 8
- 4 min read
Technology is meant to empower us — to help us work smarter, connect better, and make life a little easier. But in the wrong hands, it can be twisted into a tool of harm.
Recent reports, including a Crikey article and a powerful episode from The 7am Podcast, have shed light on how artificial intelligence — tools like ChatGPT — is now being weaponised by abusers to deepen coercive control in relationships.
Coercive control is not always loud. Often, it’s subtle and strategic — designed to isolate, confuse, and slowly erode a person’s confidence, independence, and sense of reality. When AI gets added to the mix, the abuse becomes even harder to detect — and more dangerous to endure.
How Abusers Are Misusing AI to Enforce coercive Control
“AI doesn’t understand context or morality — it mirrors the intentions of its user.” Madison Griffiths
Generative AI tools like ChatGPT are designed to be helpful and agreeable — they lean toward giving the user what they ask for. But here’s the catch: if that user is an abuser, the technology can unintentionally reinforce harmful narratives.
As discussed on the 7am Podcast, one abuser told ChatGPT that his partner was overreacting to his behaviour. The chatbot replied that his partner's reactions sounded irrational. In doing so — unintentionally — the AI validated coercive beliefs, giving the abuser what felt like permission to continue.
Other examples of misuse include:
Generating manipulative text messages or gaslighting scripts
Creating threatening content or emotionally charged “apologies”
Researching ways to isolate or spy on partners more effectively
Using AI-generated advice to justify emotionally abusive behaviours
And because AI systems are designed to skew in favour of the user, they’re inherently biased — not toward truth or context, but toward the narrative being fed to them.
This dynamic can further disempower victims, making them feel confused, irrational, or even responsible for the abuse.
If This Sounds Familiar — You’re Not Alone
If you’ve experienced this type of control — or you’re only now starting to piece together that something wasn’t right — I want to be very clear:
You are not overreacting.
You are not to blame.
And there is a way through this.
Practical Ways to Protect Yourself
If you suspect someone is using technology against you, here are a few simple steps that can help:
🔐 Secure your devices and accounts
Change passwords regularly, especially on shared accounts.
Use two-factor authentication for added security.
Check for hidden apps or tracking permissions on your phone.
📱 Use safe tech to reach out
If you’re in danger or planning to leave, consider using a separate device or account to research support or contact services.
📸 Document the behaviour (if safe)
Keep a record of text messages, AI-generated content, or abusive prompts.
Store evidence somewhere secure, or with someone you trust.
🧍♀️ Talk to someone outside the situation
Abuse often thrives in isolation. Whether it’s a friend, therapist, or support worker — you deserve to be heard by someone who believes you.
Where to Turn for Help
You don’t have to go through this alone. These services offer confidential support throughout Australia:
1800RESPECT – 24/7 family, domestic, and sexual violence support📞 1800 737 732 | 1800respect.org.au
Lifeline – Crisis support and suicide prevention📞 13 11 14 | lifeline.org.au
Services Australia – Support for those leaving violent situations🌐 servicesaustralia.gov.au
The Daisy App – Helps you find nearby support services, with privacy in mind
How Hypnotherapy and Strategic Psychotherapy Can Support You
Experiencing coercive control — especially when reinforced by technology — can leave you feeling confused, anxious, and disconnected from yourself. That’s where the right mental health support can make all the difference.
Combining clinical hypnotherapy and strategic psychotherapy — is a powerful approach designed to support you as you:
Rebuild your sense of self and emotional safety
Untangle manipulation and rediscover your voice
Let go of guilt, fear, and shame that was never yours to carry
Regain clarity, calm, and control over your thoughts and decisions
Learn how to set emotional boundaries and develop self-trust again
Unlike traditional talk therapy, we don’t need to relive every detail (which can be a relief when dealing with trauma). Instead, we focus on how the problem plays out in your day-to-day life — and work to change that pattern from the inside out.
You are the expert in your own life. My job is to guide you back to that truth.
You Deserve Peace. You Deserve Clarity. You Deserve You Back.
If someone has used AI — or anything else — to control or diminish you, please know that healing is possible. You don’t have to stay in survival mode. You don’t have to stay stuck.
When you’re ready to talk about where you're at, what you need, you can contact me and find out how we can work together.
You don’t need to have all the answers. You just need a safe place to start.
Sources:
https://7ampodcast.com.au/episodes/weaponising-ai-how-chatbots-are-becoming-tools-for-domestic-abuse
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